Nobody enters a relationship with the intention of tolerating a cheating partner. We all desire to find that special someone we can boldly call ours. But if you suspect he might be involved with other women, there are some signs he may be cheating on you that you can look out for.
Sadly, as long as a relationship is concerned, anything can happen. I would compare entering into a new relationship to receiving an unknown package from a total stranger – you have no idea what you’ll find inside… That’s exactly what to expect from any new relationship. Uncertainties!
No matter how hard you’ve tried to ascertain the kind of person he is, surely there are things about him you’ll get to find out only after agreeing to either date or marry him. One of such things is cheating. You can’t really find out if he will be a cheat until you start dating him. This is simply because he will be very careful not to expose that aspect of his life when trying to woo you.
Signs he may be cheating
It is one thing to have a cheating partner, but it is another thing to find out you are with one. These two situations are quite different because one is worse than the other. If he is cheating on you, that’s obviously not cool. But then the worst thing that can happen to you is when you have no clue whether or not he’s actually cheating on you. Some guys are smart enough to cover their footprints, you can never trace their steps!
I call that double-cheating because;
- First, he’s cheating on you by mingling with another girl.
- Secondly, he is cheating on you by giving you no clue (by hiding the fact that he’s cheating, by posing to be innocent when he’s not). Sounds like double-cheating to me.
To say the least, it’s a very scary topic to think about. Being with a cheating partner. But because you’re at risk of unknowingly falling into such a relationship, you have to be aware of the signs he may be cheating. Some of these signs might not be very obvious, but you still have to consider them a red flag. And by doing so, you will know whether you can condone such or not.
As you read on, I will let you in on 10 low-key signs he may be cheating on you.
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1. He is Seemingly Distracted
The very first sign to check out is if he appears increasingly distracted. Of course, there are times a man could get overwhelmed with work that he hardly notices anything around him. That is quite understandable.
However, in a situation where your man (who used to give you unchallenged attention) starts getting unnecessarily distracted, then you should be seriously concerned.
It’s a red light if he hardly maintains a conversation with you without looking at a passer-by. If he is cheating on you, he may begin to disconnect from you both physically and emotionally.
As a matter of fact, for any significant change of attitude (which is negative), there is a higher tendency he’s seeing another woman. Experts suggest that you will easily find out if he loves you more or less from his attitude.
This disconnection, most times, isn’t because he’s scared of hurting you but because he doesn’t want to feel guilty. He will definitely feel guilty of cheating if the connection is still there. But when he is already detached, it will be easier for him to say goodbye when you eventually find out his escapades.
Moreover, if he is no longer into you, but doesn’t have the guts to initiate a breakup, he will try to get distracted and make you feel disconnected from him so that you will be forced to move on with your life.
Therefore, when you notice any form of weird action, ranging from physical distraction to emotional disconnection, then it’s a sign he may be cheating or perhaps, he is no longer interested.
2. He Doesn’t Let You Meet His Friends
Another not so obvious sign he may be cheating is when he prefers spending all his time with his friends without you. Remember, any normal boyfriend or husband would definitely like to show you off to his friends. So, why is he different? Why does he seemingly prefer to hide you away?
First, it could be because he is not comfortable having you around his friends because his friends know he’s cheating on you. He wouldn’t want to risk you knowing his friends because it might not be long before they intentionally or unintentionally let the cat out of the bag.
Secondly, he wouldn’t like you to have a clue where he’s going to, who he will meet, when he’ll be coming back, etc. This may be because he has a lot of things going on with other girls that he wouldn’t like you to know or hear about. He will like to put you out of the picture totally.
Once you notice this particular weirdness about him, then you have every right to be concerned.
3. His Plans For The Future Suddenly Change
When a man is in love, he will definitely mention his future plans to his partner. In fact, his future will be built around her because he will always involve her in such plans. But then, when your boyfriend, who once involved you in his future, suddenly starts sounding differently, then you need to be more attentive!
For instance, if he usually used more of “we” when talking about the future, but suddenly starts using more of “I”, then it’s not a good sign.
Another example is when he suddenly starts planning moving to a new city once he gathers enough money. Meanwhile, his initial plan was to get married and start a family.
At this point, you have to face reality. There is a cause for the sudden change of plans. There is a reason he suddenly stopped involving you.
Those plans that used to be all about you might now be all about another girl.
4. He Starts Pointing Out All Your Flaws
When the relationship is at its initial (blossoming) stage, he will find you perfect. In fact, your imperfections will be perfect for him. Yeah, it’s real.
However, when he starts finding faults unnecessarily and saying insensitive stuff like, “Why can’t you learn how to dance better?” then it’s highly possible his latest affair is with a great dancer. Perhaps he’s a bit frustrated by the fact that you are nothing like the new “exciting” girl in his life.
Another reason he started noticing your flaws might be because he’s subconsciously blaming you for cheating on you. Hilarious, right? But that’s a fact.
In his mind, he’s probably thinking that if you were good enough, then he wouldn’t have cheated. In other words, his fault-finding attitude might also be because he’s feeling guilty and is trying to be defensive.
These things might sound like movies to you, but then, they’re real! Some people are generally like that, not only men.
5. He Either Gets Less Intimate Or Too Intimate
Another sign he may be cheating is when his sexual behaviour changes suddenly. He might start getting too or less intimate. I’m sure you can relate to this very well. But then, let me explain further.
There is a high possibility he will feel less attracted to you when he’s having an affair with someone else out there. His sex drive once he’s around you could be massively affected. He might start feeling weird to touch you. Perhaps, touching you feels like cheating on his “new girl”. Ironic, isn’t it?
You should be concerned when he stops initiating intimacy or when he seemingly starts avoiding any form of intimacy a lot. This is apparently because he’s lost interest in you.
On the other hand, when your partner starts getting too intimate all of a sudden, your eyebrows should be raised. A man can start getting overly sexual, or romantic, or affectionate simply because he’s feeling kind of guilty and trying to cover up his infidelity!
Also, consider the fact that it’s possible his thirst for sex increased because he’s becoming more sexually active (with other girls). Hence, whenever he’s with a girl, the only thing on his mind is SEX. And unfortunately, you are no exception!
6. He Always Mentions Strange Names
One way we exhibit our obsession with something or someone is by calling the name reflexively. When your partner is cheating, he might be carried away and may give you some clues by how he mentions her name unintentionally (in the middle of a conversation).
When this happens and you ask who she is, always expect responses like; “Oh Sandra? She’s my colleague. Oh, we work in the same department”.
Well, while I won’t dispute the fact that he might be saying the truth, you have to be extra careful and observe closely; perhaps it’s also a sign he may be cheating on you.
7. His Phone Gets Busier
This is a very popular one, and quite more noticeable than the others on this list.
While it is easier to cheat with a smartphone, it’s also quite easier for one to be caught! Don’t tell me you don’t know the difference between when a guy is talking to a girl he’s interested in and when he’s talking to a random person. His tone certainly changes.
Now, you should be a bit worried if he starts receiving such calls often. You should be concerned when he suddenly starts sounding so polite over the phone like a customer care representative. At this point, it won’t be wrong if you ask him why he no longer permits you to play games on his phone.
Another factor you should observe closely is those online chats that keep him awake all night. You should be even more concerned if such chats make him smile often.
However, this is NOT to say that he is not loyal (even when showing these signs). But it won’t be wrong if you pay closer attention once you notice such changes (especially with his mobile phone).
8. He Starts Paying More Attention To His Appearance
It’s not only girls that pay attention to their appearance once they want to impress the opposite gender (in a new relationship), men also indulge in such. Hence, it’s a sign he MAY be cheating if your once-a-carefree boyfriend suddenly starts paying more attention to his physical outlook.
Unless you suggested it to him, he might be on a mission to impress the latest girl in his life.
9. He Runs Out Of Cash More Often
Some relationships are highly demanding, especially if one party is trying so hard to impress the other.
Now, if your boyfriend is the type that used to be financially supportive when it mattered, there is every possibility that the reason he doesn’t have enough cash to spare anymore is that his finances are redirected to somewhere else.
You have to be alert if it gets to this point; especially if he has no project at hand, or if he never informed you of any new savings or investment plans.
10. Your Intuition Tells You Something Is Wrong
This is maybe one of the first signs he may be cheating, but one that is often overlooked.
We all have that natural voice in our mind that tells us things that are often not far from the truth.
In other words, if your intuition tells you he’s cheating on you, then he may actually be cheating.
Your intuitive faculty often has a way to pick up some little clues which are not obvious, then magnify them to show you the bigger picture of what might be going wrong. For this reason, I can’t tell you that you are wrong if you’ve got such feelings.
Final Tip:
Tracing the signs he may be cheating is not rocket science. It’s something any woman can do once she pays more attention to his behavioral changes just like the ones discussed above. As a matter of great importance, you deserve to know what to expect of him when he cheats… By so doing, you won’t be taken by surprise (much).
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